Is there something in the water in the Carolinas that makes politicians just plain stoopid?

First, there’s North Carolinian John Edwards.  You remember him?  The former Senator and blue VEEP candidate and his media whore mistress - who’s bastard love child might have been fathered by either Edwards or his former BFF Andrew Young.  Or not.  We may never know because she don’t want no DNA done to find out who’s really her baby daddy.  At least Edward’s staff was pretty much able to keep their candidate’s between the sheets campaigning under the covers.  Well, at least until the National Enquirer caught on to his lyin’, cheatin’, two-timin’ womanizin’ ways.

Course, since Edward’s is a dimocrat, did you really expect him to act any different?

Now, we have South Carolina’s governor, Mark Sanford.  Seems he decided to go for a hike and wound up in Argentina.  Which just so happens to be where his mistress, Maria, lives.  What a coincidence.  She surely must be one of those hot-blooded Latina lovers that guys love to write songs about - you know, like Tommy Boyce, Bobby Hart, and Wes Farrell wrote back in the day… 

In a little cafe just the other side of the border, she was just sitting there giving me looks that made my mouth water.  So I started walking her way.  She belonged to that man, Jose, and I knew, yes,I knew I should leave when I heard her say yeah, “Come a little bit closer, you’re my kind of man.  So big and so strong.  Come a little bit closer, I’m all alone…..And the night is so long…..”

Talk about a long distance romance. 

Just how do you solve a problem like Maria?  Unlike the lyin’ cheatin’ Edwards, once he was caught, Sanford ‘fessed up his Argentinian firecracker, sayin’ she sure put the zing back in his zipper.  This, of course, was much to the chagrin of his wife, who apparently told the philandering fool to get lost.  At least for a while.  We sorta wish she’d gotten just a tiny bit madder and tossed his clothes and stuff out the windows and all over the yard of the governor’s mansion while he was working out his detente or whatever he was working out down in Argentina.  As it is, he’s resigned from the Republican Governor’s Association.  That put Mississippi Governor and presidential wannabe Haley Barbour in that cat bird seat.

Sanford’s refusing to resign as governor.  The sharks are smelling the blood in the water and are circling.  Make no mistake, there are some very hungry sharks over in the Carolinas.  However, most of them are dimocrats.  So we say, big whoop.  Let them starve.  If they won’t eat their own, why should we feed them one of ours?