What a relief.  Mike Krusee is really giving up his seat under the thumb on the right hand of speaker Craddick.  Now maybe the poor unfortunate people living in his district can get someone to represent their interests - not the interests of speaker Craddick.  Looks like squeaker Krusee won’t be speaker Krusee anytime soon.  Buh bye.

That must be terrible news to his dimocrat challenger, Diana Maldonado.  Boo hoo hoo.  She won’t have Krusee to kick around anymore.  She’s gonna need a whole lot more than the $4.25 she planned to spend to beat the squeaker.

We don’t know which is more galling - the fact that dimocrats knew about this before republicans did.  And that speaker Craddick released Krusee’s leaving to the press before Krusee finally got around to it.  That’s real constituent service guys.

Rumors abound as to who will jump into the race to succeed squeaker.

Former Round Rock Mayor Nyle Maxwell is reportedly speaker Craddick’s first choice.  Of course he is - he wouldn’t have to give up any of his SOT PAC moolah for Maxwell.  Former RR city council member & losing County Judge candidate Charlie Culpepper is allegedly interested.  Reid Ryan (son of Nolan & Express CEO) is also being touted by some.

Local lobbyists Peggy Venable & Randy Lee are supposedly sniffing the air.  Puhleeze.  Do you really think the speaker can fit another lobbyist up his a** in his hip pocket?  A pox on both of you.

Capitol Staffers Hal Talton of Georgetown and Larry Gonzales of Round Rock are allegedly both interested in joining their bosses on the House floor.

It’s gonna be a lot of fun to watch whoever it is mop the floor with Maldonado. 

Precinct One Constable Gary Griffin is in the news again.  KXAN TV aired an item last Thursday about Gary’s budget woes.  It’s the latest chapter in the continuing mudfest of the Crybaby Constable (See King’s X, Bully for You, and Just Us).

His current lament is that the Gang of Four didn’t give him any money for his budget.  As a result, he can’t even afford to buy a battery for his flashlight.  Gattis the Elder counters that Griffin didn’t get any extra money in his budget because he doesn’t have any new deputies and asked for something the county doesn’t buy for constables anyway - guns.

After more than 10 years as Constable, you’d figure that he’d know how to present his budget to commissioners by now.  Too bad you’d be wrong.

Of course, when one of your deputies takes a pot shot at a bulletin board with his Taser after a budget meeting with county commissioners, it doesn’t help your argument any.  Would you buy a gun for someone like that?  Griffin shrugged off the Tasering incident as a “mental health wellness exercise“.  Replacing that battery cost the County $20.  So far, the bulletin board hasn’t sued the County. 

Unlike Griffin. 

Taxpayers might not be so lucky after Griffin or one of his deputies loses it and conducts the next “mental health wellness exercise“. 

His frivolous lawsuit against the County has gotten no traction in any of the Courts that have been forced to hear it.  With a qualified, well-funded primary opponent, Robert Chody, in the wings, it sure sucks to be Gary Griffin right about now.

Maybe he really isn’t paranoid.  Maybe people really are out to get him.  Hopefully, it will be the voters in November.

Can someone please tell Gattis and his Gang of Four that they serve on a commissioners court not a freaking Taliban court?  Check out the Statesman item here and the News 8 Austin item here.  In case you don’t believe the lying, liberal media, checkout the Gang’s very own website.

At the end of October, Gattis and his Gang decided that freedom of speech shouldn’t apply to their venue.  Used to be, anyone could stand up and address the Gang and blather on just as long as the commissioners Gangsters did.  Back then, real, live constituents got to take as much time as it took to express their talking points as the special interest shills took to present theirs.  Every now and again, this resulted in some rather long and testy meetings, not to mention showing some of the gangsters the door come the next election cycle.

Most recently, the debate over the goings on over at the T. Don Hutto Secure Family Home for Wayward Aliens and the Mount Hutto Scenic Trashpile and Overlook apparently just took up way too much time to suit Gattis and his Gang.  

Thus, the new rules about limiting the number of speakers allowed to address the Gang - moved and seconded by commissioners Gangsters Covey and Birkman, respectively.  Now, only 10 of the Gang’s BFFs will get the honor of speaking their minds.  Imagine that, they can keep track of the allowed speakers using just their fingers.  When the Wizard of Wilco runs out of fingers, call the question and vote.  BTW: Your 15 minutes of fame also just got limited to three minutes here in Wilco World. - after you complete the “Public Participation Form”.   While we agree with time limits on speakers, we are definitely NOT down with any of the rest of the manifesto.

You can’t insult one of them at a meeting either.  

“Accordingly, members of the public in attendance at any Regular, Special and/or Emergency meeting of the ourt shall conduct themselves with proper decorum in speaking to, and/or addressing the Court; in participating in public discussions before the Court; and in all actions in the presence of the Court.”

Furthermore, you can’t

“…insult the honesty and/or integrity of the Court, as a body, or any member or members of the Court, or other public officials individually or collectively.”

Lucky for our readers, that stoopid little rule won’t bother us none. We can and do insult elected officials individually and collectively right here if they deserve it.  And they do.  Thin-skinned, chicken-sh*t autocrats.

Assuming you care enough to expend the time, effort, and energy to even attend one of their coma-inducing meetings, you still might not get your three minutes in the spotlight. 

Taking a page from Queen County Clerk Nancy Rister’s little black book of Real and Imagined Rules of Etiquette, the Gangsters set up some more rules for people willing to unfortunate enough to attend their little indoctrination sessions. 

“Proper attire for all persons is mandatory.  Specifically, appropriate dress entails attire suitale for professional or business engagements.”

Good Grief.

How much more pretentious and officious can those joeys get?  They want you to wear your Sunday-go-to-meetin’ clothes just to watch and listen to them congratulate themselves after spending your tax dollars faster than a congressman tapping his foot in an airport bathroom?? 

With the new dress code, will plumbers be required to reveal their butt cleavage?  Heck, we shudder to think what professional attire is to that tatooed lady down in Round Rock. How about we put an item about SOBs on the agenda?  No, we’re not referring to the Gang of Four when we say SOBs, we mean Sexually Oriented Businesses.  We’d like a bunch of hookers to show up in feathers and leather - their normal business attire - and watch what the Gang of Four comes up with then. 

Rats!!  They got that one covered, too.  The High Sheriff or his designee gets to serve as Bailiff for the Gang.  What a grand idea.  If we fill up the jail and clog our court dockets with those bothersome, opinionated, poorly dressed, ignorant constituents, our Gangsters will be out of their weekly meetings in plenty of time for their fundraising luncheons and afternoon tee times.  Or to run their private businesses.  After putting in, what, a grueling eight-hour work week for a mere $70K a year?

Anybody know where Leslie Cochran hangs out these days?  Maybe he’ll show up wearing a Cedar Park thong and get to spend the winter in our no star crossbar hotel instead of on Congress Avenue down south.

Can’t wait to see Covey and Birkman hit the campaign trail in their Berkas.

UPDATE   UPDATE   UPDATE:  Here’s what our Fearless Leader opines.

My, my, my….the dimocrat bloggers have got their knickers in a twist speculating about Mike Krusee.  The blue bloggers are convinced that Squeaker Krusee is sooo afraid of his dimocrat opponent, RRISD school board trustee Diana Maldonado, that he just got himself an appointment to a cushy “state transportation job”.

The heck you say. 

What sort of “state transportation job” would he be qualified for?  Is there an office for selling pigs in a poke somewhere in TxDOT?  Well, uh, now that we think about it, there might possibly be one over in their toll road marketing section.  Fer sure, there must be a spot for Squeaker over in the Cintra - Zachry contract negotiation section.  What more could they possible want — we gave them the baby and the bathwater, with the horses and the barn thrown in for good measure. 

Most likely it was the Squeaker vs the speaker dust up at the end of the last session and his subsequent attempted suck kiss up to the speaker that may have left Krusee a little too vulnerable this election cycle.  However, HD 52 is a safely 60% red district - normally.  When Krusee ran last time, it was was an electrifying 50.44% red.

However fickle Krusee’s support of Craddick might be, the speaker’s supporters are bailing out of the House on the right and on the left faster than the UT athletic department is turning out felons.  It’s going to make for some verrrrrry interesting opening days of the next session.  

BTW:  Craddick is supposed to announce his interim charges tomorrow. 

*yawn*

Ever watch a lame duck try to keep a grip on a gavel?

Besides being the Lord’s day, today is Veteran’s Day - AKA Armistice Day.  You should be on your knees today giving thanks.  President Woodrow Wilson proclaimed November 11 Armistice Day:

To us in America, the reflections of Armistice Day will be filled with solemn pride in the heroism of those who died in the country’s service and with gratitude for the victory, both because of the thing from which it has freed us and because of the opportunity it has given America to show her sympathy with peace and justice in the councils of the nations…”

A Real Republican, Native Texan, and Real American Hero, our 34th President Dwight David Eisenhower, issued the first Veteran’s Day proclamation (after Congress passed a resolution changing the name from Armistice Day) in 1954.  Thus, today we honor veterans of all wars.

We’ll let you in on a little secret:  No matter what we do for our war veterans, it will never be enough.

Remember that the next time you hear about the wretched condition of our veterans hospitals. 

Remember that the next time your elected officials vote against adequate funding for veterans’ hospitals and medical services.  Remember that when your elected officials ignore substandard housing conditions on our military installations. 

Remember that when you find out your elected officials have been lining their own pockets at the expense of our men and women in uniform.  Remember that the next time a draft dodging politician wraps themself in the flag and slams a former POW as being unfit to serve his country either in congress or as President. 

Remember that every day, not just Veteran’s Day.

Today was election day.  Remember?  Oh, you forgot?  Don’t fret about it, about 90 percent of the rest of the registered voters forgot, too.

Here in Wilco world, congratulations are in order for the 7,132 of you who voted early.  We don’t know about any of the rest of you because there are still no other results posted.  Two hours after the polls close and we still don’t know squat.  Looks like all that money spent on those new-fangled electronic voting machines was money well spent. 

Wilco early voting returns show Propositions 4 (the billion-dollar bonds) and 15 (the three-billion dollar cancer bonds) taking a dive.  Here in Wilco world we recognize a boondoggle when we vote against one.  Too bad we are surrounded by those who don’t.  Statewide, with just over 3% of the votes in, both are passing - Prop 4 by 58% to 41% and Prop 15 by 63% to 37%. 

It’s your money.  Now, you can kiss a couple of billion of it goodbye.  Thanks for not voting.

In the special election for HD 97 (Anna Mowery’s seat), looks like there’s gonna be a runoff.  Heck, with seven guys on the ballot that’s a no-brainer.  With 90% of the votes in, the dimocrat is leading with 31.75%.  What makes this race really interesting is that the Craddick supporter is a waaaaay distant fourth at this point (16.78%).  That’s gotta hurt.  Some pundits say this is a bellweather race on Craddick’s leadership.  It’s a 62% or thereabouts red district. We’ll see.

Looks like Kentuckians made Ernie Fletcher, their republican governor, a one-term wonder.  He was indicted for violating state merit system hiring laws - a misdemeanor.  He beat the rap, but apparently not the ride.    Mississippi Governor Haley Barbour, who - before Hurricane Katrina - was considered the republican to beat in the presidential race, looks to be easily cruising to reelection. 

If anything interesting happens, we’re going to sleep through it.  Force yourself to read a newspaper or listen to the news tomorrow and find out how it all came out.

Former Houston dimocrat State Representative Ron Wilson really knows the meaning of chutzpah. 

To recap his legislative legacy, he’s known for carrying the legislation that gave us the Texas Moron Tax - AKA: the Texas Lottery.  Then, there were his bills to turn the empty Astrodome into a casino, and to create “racinos” (slot machines at race tracks).  After being bounced from office, he stayed in Austin (surprise) and opened a law practice (surprise, surprise). 

Last week, according to the Ft Worth Star Telegram, Wilson has let it be known he wants the governor to appoint him to either the UT Board of Regents or the Public Safety Commission.   Why, pray tell, does Wilson believe the governor would entertain such a notion?  Last we saw him, Wilson had weaseled his way back into the spotlight when speaker Craddick appointed him and Terry Keel his Parliamentarians at the end of last session.  Yep, Craddick appointed a screamin’ meanie dimocrat to help his hang on to his speakership - and those thousand-dollar johns in his capitol crib.

Maybe his lawyerin’ bidness ain’t goin’ so well.  Maybe he misses the free UT football tickets and great parking spaces members of the lege get (see Friends in Low Places).  Whatever his reasoning, he’s sure got chutzpah.  

We’re sort of confused as to why Wilson went to the press with his plea.  And why Fort Worth?  Seeing as he’s sooo tight with speaker Craddick, we’re wondering why he just didn’t have his BFF, the speaker, give the governor a call and plead his case for him.  Or maybe he did.  Just sayin’ we’re wondering about all this.

Whatcha wanna bet on the outcome?